Tuesday, April 29, 2008

meeting family

The present I brought, a two-DVD set of bootlegged copies of The Aristocats and The Aristocrats wrapped in a custom designed collaged cover promising “entertainment for the whole family,” made only half the people laugh, and they really didn’t appreciate the Belgian beer I’d spent a fortune on. “Belgian?” I realized that they neither knew where Belgium was nor knew anything about monks brewing beer nor what a Trappist was nor had they seen – or heard of – the funnier of the two movies. After all, we’d been the only two people in the theatre the night we saw it in town, and it only played three nights.

The sun was out and it looked like spring and I sat in the room wanting to be outside, but the wind was wicked and it was really just a degree or two above freezing, and so I snuck out on each half hour for a cigarette, and went to the bathroom a lot, and nursed the great beer because an already uncomfortable event can become a disaster mighty easily if you speed the drinking to ease the pain.

“Wanna get out of here?” she finally said. “Uh, huh.” “I think we’ve put in enough time.” “Uh, huh.” She circled the room, saying goodbye. I offered small waves and smiles and perhaps two, “it was nice to meet you”s.

As we reached the driveway I handed her a DVD so I could light the cigarette. “You stole the movie you gave them?” I found the keys and unlocked the car. “Thought it might be best.” “Might not have been the best idea in the first place.” “Maybe not.”

We drove home from that small city to this. “You really don’t have to like my cousins, we’ll only see them once or twice a year.” “No problem,” I said, “next time I’ll bring cheaper beer.” I turned a corner, there was clanking from the back seat. “You stole the beer back too?” “Uh, huh.”

copyright 2008 by Ira Socol

3 comments:

Kj said...

Ahh, so this is where you went...

HomerTheBrave said...

Reminds me of visiting friends in New Mexico on the way back home from Texas. I brought them special beer from Texas. They had gotten me special beer from Texas. Same beer. I ended up driving most of the way home with the beer I had bought for them. (Shiner Bock, from the Spoetzl brewery in Shiner, TX, founded by German immigrants in the 1800s... so there is history. You can get it in Ohio or Wisconsin.)

Anyway. Very funny story.

Free N Clear said...

now this was funny